Finding my Happiness



The week I took these photos I was on a streak of happiness. I couldn't find the reason why I was so happy but I will never question it again. I've been on a pursuit for this feeling for over a year and I want everyone to reach that feeling. Life is hard but we can have some control if we try. Below are some tips I'd like to give that helped me tremendously.

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Be honest with yourself

We never want to be called a liar. But lets be honest, how many times have you lied to yourself? How many times have you told yourself "No, they didn't mean it that way," but in reality, they totally did. Or have you told yourself "I'm not tired, I can keep going?" When in reality if you fell asleep at that moment you would sleep for at least 12 hours. Start being honest with yourself and how things make you feel. You have to care for you. When someone or something makes you feel bad about yourself and its happened twice, don't try for the third time. You deserve better. Leave it alone. When you are tired, rest. Our minds need sleep, our bodies need it also. Don't deprive yourself of your necessities. And onto one of the most repeated lies of all time: "I'm fine." It's normal to occasionally feel down. But if you are feeling down for an extended period of time, or find things that are very hard to get over, it's okay to be honest and say "I am not fine." And this brings me to my next tip, when you are feeling this way, seek help.

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Talk to someone

I ignored and put this one off for over 5 years. I have said I was going to get a therapist so many times and when I'm not feeling at my lowest I'll forget about it. I decided to finally do it when I found myself grinding away at the little confidence I had left. It wasn't the easiest decision, I thought people would be like "Are you crazy? Are you suicidal?" But most people were supportive and thought it was a good thing to do. And it has been. I practically want to tell my therapist I love her. She is amazing. She has made me see the good things about myself and what I want to work on. She also brought to my attention that in life we have hiccups, but life goes on and we don't have to dwell on things. (And somehow this writing is naturally flowing, into point three: continue reading)

Forgive yourself, You are human

We are hard on ourselves. We are our own worst critics. Mistakes happen. We do things sometimes we wish we didn't. But guess what? These things happen for a reason. We learn. I mean, what else do you think we are here for? Everyday we are learning even if its the fact that that tree was there and we never noticed. We are learning creatures. And in the end, we are going to be teaching our lessons to someone else as advice, and it will be all worth it. So forgive yourself. And if you have to apologize to someone for something you did wrong, apologize. We are not perfect, nothing is. And thats the beauty of it all.  (Now this is getting scary, I wont repeat it again but somehow we are rolling up to point four, and its something that isn't perfect and we accept it, yup its nature.)

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Go outside and appreciate the natural things that you have no control over

They say nature has a way of boosting our mood and thats why we should get outside the house. I really encourage this one. Sit at the park or maybe even on your porch and take some time out to appreciate everything. One day at work I sat outside and I noticed the birds were just chirping away. For some reason my mind started to wonder. "What are they chirpin' bout? I wonder is she/he talking to their mate? Or are they claiming their territory?" And I laughed at myself. I felt like a kid again, I was so curious. I admired the flowers and the bees, which I'm terrified of (who wants to get stung?) But I have learned they aren't terrified of me and they are busy getting their pollen on. And it was interesting. They were living their life, doing what they do. I was so lost in nature and calm. It felt nice, so sometimes, go outside. Listen to the cars drive by, the kids laughing chasing each other, and even the rain. Oh we let the rain ruin our days, but we shouldn't. We need that rain. It keeps the grass green, flowers blooming and cools us off a little. Nature has it's positives and it's free. Enjoy it.

Do one thing a week you really enjoy

Find that thing and always make time for it. Play some sports if that helps you relieve stress and feels good.  Read a book you've been wanting to. Get that mani/pedi you've been promising yourself. Go out to eat with your Bestfriend. Dance the night away cause it makes you happy. Spend time with your kiddo(s) and laugh. Do at least one thing a week that you thoroughly enjoy.

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Those are my five tips and I hope it helps someone. Anxiety and depression is no fun. But it happens, its okay, and you can get through it. In this day and age we are groomed to be stressed and that has always baffled me. I want everyone to be happy however, and until we find that golden key to it, we've got to work on it. You deserve happiness.

And if you are interested in therapy there are various options. You can find one by looking online or calling through your insurance to assist you. Consider the things that matter to you when looking for one, whether that be age, gender, race, or therapy methods. And sometimes you wont find the right person the first time so its okay to try another one, just like any other doctor. There are also therapy groups, people who offer free counseling, and counselors at your place of worship if you have one. Research, the internet if your friend in this one.

Black use shoes 2018

DRESS ASOS Midi Pencil Dress With Contrast Stitch Detail and Pep Hem from ASOS
SHOES ASOS TESSA Lace Up Heeled Sandals from ASOS
EARRINGS ASOS Long Tusk Drop Earrings from ASOS
PURSE Vinyl cover bag by Mango